- In his “Overall comments” my tutor Robert commented: "This work is interesting and diverse. You’ve done quite well to find some ‘telling moments’ of human activity in the Blues n’ Jazz Rally. There here are times when you capture a strong image and show a good eye for telling gestures and amusing juxtapositions (the little kid and the band)."
- In the "Assignment potential" Robert added: "From the work you have shown in this assignment, providing you commit yourself to the course, I believe you have the potential to succeed at assessment."
- Speaking about the "Learning Logs/Critical Essays" section Robert stated:"I like the way you interpret some of your photos, like the picture of the boy lost in the enchantment of the music. All that is great for developing your understanding of how images communicate and makes you more ready to notice it when you are making photos. Your research into Ruff and Calle is interesting, informed and objective. You’ve done a really good job. You will need to do more and to start making the connection between what you make (or are currently working on) and the research you do. After all, other photographers should be helping you."
=> I am very pleased with all the above comments and I am very motivated to improve further my photographic skills.
Things to improve
- Image 1. "This is a nice, decisive moment in many ways, capturing the singer’s eye in a moment of pause. You’ve married up the different lights well and the shallow depth of field helps her stand out even though the environment looks pretty messy. I think you could darken (burn) the large pole on the right to stop it competing for the viewer’s attention."
=> Here is my correction following Robert's suggestion:
Before.
After.
- Image 6. "This kid looks like he’s being visited by aliens! It’s a really nice juxtaposition of childhood and adulthood. The coloured light around the boy stands as a metaphor for his childhood joy, and the empty grey space suggests something like a frontier he needs to cross to become a man like those guys! Did you not notice the slanted stage? You must straighten your horizontal and vertical lines unless they add some dynamic to the picture. In this case they didn’t."
=> Here is my correction following Robert's suggestion:
Before.
After.
- Image 8-9. "You are clearly aware that the last two images are very degraded in quality. It’s a shame because both are good images of the general happy milieu of the place. If you’ve got some other good photos, try to build on the best images here themically."
=> I decided to replace these images with this one:
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